OUT WITH THE OLD

In December, I like to do a lit’l something called “a clean sweep.” I start with my clothes. If I don’t like something, but it’s still in good shape I toss it into the “Good Will” pile. If I don’t like it and it’s seen better days, it ends up as a “car rag” or in the trash. I try to live by the rule that if I haven’t worn it in a year, it’s out, but as with most rules, there are exceptions.

If I haven’t worn it in a year just because I haven’t worn it in a year, it’s definitely gone. If I haven’t worn it in a year because I’m still working on whittling down my girlish figure, it stays. Unless of course it’s dated and then it goes no matter how much weight I lose. The 80’s aren’t coming back folks so rid yourself of the notion and any 80’s wardrobe you may have hangin’ around.

On that note – Interestingly enough, skinny jeans are back but sadly – sniff, sniff – gravity old age dictates I cannot wear them again… Sigh.
Big sagging ass + big sagging boobs + skinny jeans = Blindness and projectile vomiting for all those around me.

I also make a “clean sweep” of paperwork. I’m a receipt hoarder. I keep receipts from 30 days to a whole year, depending on what I’ve purchased. I don’t think its a bad thing but in most cases it’s certainly unnecessary. But still, I do it. So the last week of December has me going through a mountain of receipts because after a year, ya’ never know. I may want to return that case of yogurt I bought back in February…

The freezer, fridge and cabinets get a clean sweep too. I’m absolutely anal with expiration dates on food! I’m constantly checking online to see how long food stuff will actually keep. I like this site, ‘Eat By Date‘ because it tells you other bits of info to consider when you’re deciding whether to toss it or keep it. If you’re into food storage for the long haul you’ll find lots of good info here, ‘Prepared Housewives.’

Emotionally, I make an effort to toss out old negative feelings and replace them with new warm fuzzies to start the New Year. I always look at the New Year as my last and final present to be opened because inside my glorious New Year’s box are even more presents!
This is me waiting for the New Year.
A year FULL of presents! Endless possibilities and all things wonderful that are yet to come! A surprise awaiting me around every corner! When the New Year comes I am definitely an “out with the old, in with the new” kinda’ girl.

Something the “out with the old, in with the new” phrase doesn’t apply to?
FABRIC! Seriously, is there even such a thing?? Old fabric, new fabric..
It’s fabric people and you can never have enough or too much of it!

Do you do an end of the year “out with the old, in with the new?”
What do you get rid of and what absolutely stays??

MOODY MONDAY

Dear Self,
It’s cold. It’s pouring down rain. It’s 4:30 in the morning, why the hell aren’t you sleeping???

Yeah, well, “self” has no answer for that so here I sit, bright eyed and bushy haired, coffee in hand ready to take on the day. Okay, not really ready at this moment but a few more cups of my cowboy coffee with ‘Frosted Sugar Cookie’ creamer in it and I will be!

If you guys haven’t tried this stuff right here, you really should because it will turn any cup of coffee into a cup of heaven. So, so yummy. Like a Christmas cookie in a mug!
Love this stuff!
Side note: Obviously I drink a lot of tea at my house too.
#lipton  #yogi  #sleepytime

The mood just kinda’ struck me for today’s prompt as I came across some rather interesting Christmas ornaments online and I thought, who would put this shit on their Christmas tree?? Personally, I wouldn’t hang not a one of ’em on any tree in my home but to each his/her own if you happen to be in the nut hut, right?

Creepy doll face. No thanks.

Creepy, old German ornaments. I think my parents actually had some ornaments similar to these and I’m pretty sure I thought they were creepy then too.

Serial killer ornament?

Um, just because you put a Santa hat on it doesn’t make it Christmassy…

What THE hell?? Who’s sitting around thinking, hey, I know! Let’s snap the arm off of a doll, glitter it up and hang it on the tree!

This one? Just let me vomit right now. Vile and disgusting.. Who the hell could look at this thing on their Christmas tree???

And last but not least… The creepy dead girl suspended in some kind of a cage. I don’t even know.. This is just too freaky for me, and again nooottttthiiing I’m hanging on my Christmas tree!

So, “Would you or wouldn’t you” hang these ornaments on your Christmas tree???
And if any of you say yes, let me just say this right now. You’re a freak.

**Participating in #Monday Musings with ‘Write Tribe.’

BOOKS, SNOW N’ ICE, SUN N’ SAND – Pick Yer Poison

Some days the better question would be, “What aren’t you reading today?!” Yesterday, however, there was no time for reading or blogging, apparently. It’s that time of year folks and I am knee deep in all things Christmas so today is a double post covering yesterday and today. Which, I’m sure is considered “cheating” is some realm of the blogging world but hey, it’s my blog. I can double post if I want!

Lately, my typical reading day has been starting out like this.

Afternoon light reading has been this.
I love Danielle Steel and one day I hope I can say that I’ve read all of her books.

I round out the evening with this.
I do start and end my days with reading the Bible. All books in between are subject to change.

Today’s post?
I’m gonna’ have to go with snow bunny on this one because I do so love my snow and I will always love my snow. That being said, because I’m getting flippin’ old, I have been toying with the idea of spending Christmas some place warm. I’m not ready for the 6/6 split of 6 months in the north, 6 months in the south but a lit’l warm up would be nice.

What about you? What are you reading? And where would you prefer to be reading it? Curled up next to a cosy fire with the snow softly falling outside. Or, lounging on the beach in dental floss listening to the ocean waves??

WHEELS UP, WHEELS DOWN OR HOMEWARD BOUND?

dec 4 prompt

 

I will actually be doing all three because I like to multi-task and I’m just cool that way.

CHRISTMAS VACATION – Via Skype, with my grandbabies and kiddos back east. I can’t wait to see their beautiful faces and see what Santa brought them all!

TRAVELING TO FAMILY – I’ll be heading up the mountain a few days ahead of Christmas to spread some holiday cheer.

STAYING HOME – Christmas Eve and Christmas day will most definitely be at home with “Tom & Jerry” and furry lit’l Luci. Low-key with some great food, great music, and great movies. Snug as bugs in a rug just relaxing… Aaaahhhhhhh.

What about you? Home, traveling or vacationing this Christmas??

 

THE STORE WE LOVE TO HATE

To my faithful readers, I know this will come as no surprise to you, but two words top my least favorite store to Christmas shop at or do any other kind of shopping at.

Fucking Walmart!

The products don’t bother me. They sell pretty much the same crap as every other store. Sometimes they’re the cheaper option. Sometimes they’re not. They price match but so do a lot of other stores. My biggest issue with Walmart is, in fact, the people of Walmart. From the so-called managers, who I personally wouldn’t let manage a room full of stuffed animals, let alone an entire store! To the cashiers, to the stockers, to the actual shoppers themselves.

Ya’ ever notice when you walk into Walmart the only person doing their job, and doing it well, are the Walmart door greeters? And most of them are special needs people! There’s your insight to the rest of the employees that half-assed work there. It has been my experience that 99.9% of all Walmart employees are disgruntled, lazy and I’m guessing barely made it out of elementary school. – Just a guess. –  Aside from the door greeters, the only employees you see even attempting to give off the appearance of working are the THREE cashiers at the THREE lines that are open!  They’re still disgruntled and their level of intelligence is questionable, but they’re there!
All THREE of ’em!
Yet another reason I don’t shop there.

It’s the universal Walmart complaint. 500 check out lanes and those dumb ass managers will NEVER open more than three fucking lines! Why??? Clearly they have the help – such as it is – because you’ll find these fine employees in clusters scattered all around the store bitching and complaining about their personal shit. Or worse, you’ll get to witness as I have in the past, one toothless minimum wage worker flirting with some other toothless minimum wage worker  hidden behind a Christmas tree! NOT.EVEN.KIDDING! I’m surprised I still have my sight!
It was frightening!

Another Walmart complaint. Why aren’t all of the Walmarts laid out the same??? Aside from the pharmacy and outdoor section, nothing is ever in the same place from store to store. Sometimes the light bulbs are in automotive, sometimes they’re in the grocery. Ya’ know where they never are??? In the lighting department! C’mon Walmart, get it together. You’ve got a million stores all over. Helen Keller should be able to walk in and find a fucking lightbulb!

The Walmart shoppers themselves? Especially the laaaate night early morning shoppers??? I don’t even have enough time. Just Google “people of Walmart.”

My #1 tip for shopping at Walmart?  If you must ask one of those blue vested brainless wonders for help and their name tag has every letter of the alphabet in it JUST.MOVE.ON. they don’t speak English and you’d have better luck asking Stevie Wonder where the fucking lightbulbs are!

 

My favorite store? Kohl’s. It’s always clean. They have great stuff and you get that Kohl’s cash!

And then there’s this…

What about YOU? Where do you like to shop and what store would you rather slice your eyelids off than walk into?

CHRISTMAS MUSIC IN HELL? Yep.

 

UGH! It’s the same as last year, and the year before that, and every year that blood has been shooting out of my ears because I’ve had to listen to it! I know, I know. Turn the channel, don’t listen to it. Right? Au contraire mon frère. No, no, no, no, no. This is NOT self-inflicted torture. This song of Satan isn’t playing in my car or in my home! It’s playing in EVERY store I walk into!

My least favorite Christmas song? ‘Feliz Navidad!’ They play it eeevvverrrywhere! Whyyyy??

I’m not a Jose’ Feliciano fan to start with. I know of only two of his songs. ‘Feliz Navidad’ and the equally annoying, ‘Light My Fire.’ Both songs I’m pretty sure they play in hell.
Side note: If I leave this planet before any of you, I’ll be sure n’ let you know if I’m right.

For those of you who haven’t heard these songs. Here’s a little sampling.

The #1 song on Satan’s playlist – ‘Feliz Navidad’ by Jose’ Feliciano

And coming in a close second – ‘Light My Fire’ by Jose’ Feliciano


I hope you appreciate the hell I just put myself through to post those – like nails on a chalkboard to me – songs! And just so ya’ know, the “light my fire, light my fire, light fire” at the end of that song is enough to make me want to stab myself in the eye with a fork!

***Disclaimer – I have nothing again blind people or Latinos or blind Latinos. I just hate shitty, annoying music.

DECEMBER? WHAT HAPPENED TO NOVEMBER??

I don’t know about any of you, but November had me scrambling around life like a crackhead hooker dodging her pimp so she could hit her next pipe! And then boom, just like that November is gone and here we are into December! What the hell… Surprisingly, I actually managed to achieve some major personal goals but I ended up ditching on NanoWriMo and for a brief moment felt  like a total loser. – More on that later.

My number one goal this month is simple. I just want to get my Christmas packages mailed out on time without having to pay out the ass for shipping. Seriously. UPS and FedEx totally rape you on shipping fees if you don’t meet their cut-off date. You end up paying more for shipping than what you paid for the gifts inside the box! Not only that, is it just me or does it seem like the cut-off date for shipping gets early every year? I may just be getting fucking old. Fortunately this year, I’m ahead of the game. So ya’ know who’s NOT paying out the ass for shipping? This bitch right here. I’m on it! – Yet another excuse reason for ditching on NanoWriMo. –  I will be mailing my packages on December 10th! Almost a full week ahead of the cut-off date. Go me!

For those of you who can’t seem to get your shit together may be running a little behind as I once was, here are the deadlines for Christmas deliveries via your various shipping options in the U.S.

  • POST OFFICE
    December 15th for Standard Post Service (everyday mail)
    December 19th for First Class Mail
    December 21st for Priority Mail
    December 23rd for Priority Mail Express
    Online calculator here.
  • UPS
    December 16th for Ground.
    Online calculator here.
  • FEDEX
    December 16th for Ground.
    Online calculator here.
    ***Shipping costs are dependent upon size, weight and destination. Use the online calculator. That’s why I put up the links.

You’re welcome.

IN OTHER NEWS: I am inching closer and closer to my goal of re-establishing myself into the church of my birth – Catholic – and recently participated in the Rite of Welcoming, or the Rite of Acceptance where I received this beautiful, blessed cross.
I have one more Rite in February – the Rite of Election – and then First Communion at Easter! I’m super excited about this and it’s been a wonderful, peaceful, joyful journey thus far.

NANOWRIMO – First of all. I feel super bad about ditching but only because I had teamed up with another friend so I feel like I ditched on her. – Sorry (again) Tracy! – I got up to about 30,000 words on one novel and then shifted gears and decided on a different novel altogether. Writing two novels at once, as I’m sure some of you know, NOT easy. It was like a never-ending ping-pong game of words and characters bouncing around in my head! So, I jumped the NanoWriMo ship but continued on and in so doing was fortunate enough to touch base with two, semi-local agents. One of which deals primarily in screenwriting… Now there’s a twist, huh? All a part of my “off to make my dreams come true…”

Thanksgiving was phenomenal and I discovered a new theme to my life. I call it, “adjusting my sails.” It’s been challenging. I’ve had to let go of a lot of what was and embrace what is. The growing pains have been, well, painful. Hopefully more so for me than those around me but I seem to have embarked upon an amazing journey. It’s like I got on the wrong plane at the airport and ended up some place that I’ve never been before and it’s beyond wonderful.

I am thriving in my faith and really enjoying, and finding joy in everything about my church and it’s teachings. I am in no way perfect. I’m still trying to rectify my judgmental, opinionated, cussing like a sailor self to falling asleep praying the Rosary at night, but I’m getting there.

You’ll notice my little angel and devil pics at different sections of my post. I’ll be using those a lot, one more than the other one at times – you guess which one. – But that’s because that’s my life. I’ve always said I travel with one foot in heaven and one foot in hell. That doesn’t make me a bad person, it makes me human.

Through my new found faith – my new found love. – I’ve learned this, and it’s as true for all of you as it is for me. God loves me exactly as I am, flaws and all. Why shouldn’t I love myself the same? And so I do! Now that’s a trip. Seriously. I’ve been on this planet 52 years and until recently I’ve never said, or felt, that I love myself, but I do now and it’s okay, and it’s okay for you too. I encourage you all to give it a try. It’s such an amazing feeling…

So, as much as I feel I didn’t accomplish last month, I’ve actually made some major accomplishments and it has freed up my time so I can get back to blogging, which I missed, and I’ve missed all of you too! I have no idea where this new life path is taking me, but you’re all welcome to ride along, or not but it’d be way more fun if you did!